Understanding Your Spiritual Landscape

Understanding Your Spiritual Landscape: How Exploring Beliefs and Resources Supports Healing

Kevin Todd Brough, M.A., MFT

Balance Your Health Blog | Ascend Counseling & Wellness

“The spiritual life does not remove us from the world but leads us deeper into it.” — Henri J.M. Nouwen

In my years of clinical work, I have consistently observed that our spiritual beliefs—whether we identify with a religious tradition, consider ourselves spiritual but not religious, embrace secular humanism, or are still searching—profoundly shape how we experience life’s challenges and opportunities for healing. The research increasingly confirms what many of us intuitively understand: spirituality matters for mental health.

A comprehensive review of over 3,000 empirical studies found that the majority demonstrate positive associations between spiritual and religious beliefs and mental health outcomes, including lower rates of depression, reduced anxiety, and decreased risk of suicide (Koenig, 2012). More recently, a 2023 meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials found that spiritually-integrated therapy was moderately more effective than standard treatments, with effect sizes of .52 at post-treatment and .72 at follow-up (van Nieuw Amerongen-Meeuse et al., 2023).

Yet here is what makes this more nuanced: how we relate to spirituality matters just as much as whether we engage with it. Not all spiritual beliefs support healing—some can actually compound suffering.

Why Understanding Your Spiritual Landscape Matters

As a marriage and family therapist, I recognize that we are whole beings—not just minds to be analyzed or behaviors to be modified. In the LifeScaping System I have developed over two decades, we work with four integrated aspects of the self: Mind, Heart, Body, and Spirit. Each dimension has its own wisdom, needs, and resources. When these aspects work together in harmony—what I call the Congruent Soul—we access a deeper knowing than any single part can provide alone.

The Spirit dimension encompasses our relationship with meaning, purpose, transcendence, and ultimate values. It addresses fundamental questions: Why am I here? What gives my life meaning? How do I make sense of suffering? Is there something greater than myself that I can connect with?

Research from Hinterberger and Walter (2025) confirms that spirituality can serve as a protective factor, enhancing resilience and providing meaning that benefits mental health. However, the relationship is complex. How we conceptualize the divine or transcendent significantly impacts whether spirituality becomes a source of strength or a source of shame and fear.

The Critical Role of How We See the Divine

One of the most clinically significant discoveries in the psychology of religion concerns what researchers call the “God Image”—the internal, often unconscious representation we hold of God, a Higher Power, or Ultimate Reality. This goes beyond what we might say we believe theologically; it reflects how we experience the divine in our hearts and bodies.

A landmark meta-analysis examining 123 unique samples found that positive God representations—viewing God as loving, compassionate, and trustworthy—are consistently associated with psychological well-being. At the same time, authoritarian or punishing God images correlate with mental health symptoms (Stulp et al., 2019). This finding has profound implications for therapy.

Consider the difference between the two internal frameworks:

Accepting/Loving God Image: A person who experiences God as fundamentally loving, gracious, and compassionate can draw on this relationship for comfort, forgiveness, and hope during difficult times. Their spirituality becomes a wellspring of resilience.

Punishing God Image: A person who experiences God as judgmental, critical, and focused on punishment may live with chronic guilt, shame, and fear. Rather than finding comfort in their faith, they may feel constantly inadequate—never measuring up to impossible standards.

Research by Bradshaw et al. (2010) demonstrated that secure attachment to God is inversely associated with psychological distress, while anxious attachment to God correlates with increased distress. Silton et al. (2013) found that belief in a punitive God was significantly associated with increased social anxiety, paranoia, obsession, and compulsion, while faith in a benevolent God was associated with reductions in these same symptoms.

The therapeutic implications are significant. As Currier and colleagues found in their work with veterans, those who were struggling spiritually—feeling that their difficulties were punishment from God—were less likely to benefit from treatment (Currier et al., 2015). Conversely, those who reported increases in benevolent representations of God over the course of treatment had better clinical outcomes.

Introducing the Spiritual Resources & Beliefs Inventory

To help clients explore this vital dimension of their lives, I developed the Spiritual Resources & Beliefs Inventory as part of the VisionLogic Therapeutic Tools suite within the LifeScaping System. This assessment is designed to honor all spiritual paths—whether you identify with a specific religious tradition, consider yourself spiritual but not religious, embrace secular humanism, or are still searching for what resonates with you.

The inventory explores seven key areas:

1. Spiritual Identity and Background

Understanding how you currently identify spiritually and how your beliefs have evolved over time. This includes exploring your connection to any faith communities and the traditions that have influenced your spiritual life.

2. Spiritual Practices and Resources

Identifying the practices that currently nourish your spirit—prayer, meditation, time in nature, service, creative expression, gratitude practice, or rituals and ceremonies. We also assess how meaningful these practices are to you and where you might want to deepen your engagement.

3. Core Beliefs and God Image

This is where we explore your current perception of God, Higher Power, or Ultimate Reality. Drawing on validated research approaches, you select descriptors that best capture your experience—whether accepting, punishing, distant, or nonexistent. We also explore what gives your life ultimate meaning, your sense of purpose or calling, and how you make sense of suffering.

4. Spiritual Strengths and Resources

Identifying what sustains you during difficult times—which spiritual resources you can draw upon for resilience. We also explore your spiritual gifts and whether you have had experiences you would describe as transcendent or mystical.

5. Spiritual Challenges and Growth Areas

Acknowledging that spiritual growth often involves struggle, this section gently explores any experiences of religious trauma or spiritual harm, faith struggles or doubt, and “spiritual shadows”—patterns like spiritual bypass, perfectionism, or shame that can distort our spirituality.

6. Integration with Daily Life

Exploring how well your spiritual beliefs integrate with your daily choices and actions. Where are the gaps between what you believe and how you live? What is your typical spiritual response when facing difficulty?

7. Reflection and Future Vision

Synthesizing insights from the assessment and envisioning your spiritual life thriving one year from now. What does that look like? What concrete step could you take toward that vision?

How This Assessment Supports Healing

The Spiritual Resources & Beliefs Inventory serves multiple therapeutic purposes:

Identification of Resources: For many people, spiritual beliefs and practices represent significant but underutilized resources. The assessment helps identify what is already working and can be intentionally strengthened.

Recognition of Barriers: Sometimes spiritual beliefs that were meant to heal instead cause harm—rigid dogmatism, toxic shame, spiritual perfectionism. Naming these patterns is the first step toward transformation.

God Image Exploration: The assessment provides a structured way to explore how you actually experience the divine, not just what you think you should believe. When there is a disconnect between “head knowledge” and “heart knowledge,” as researchers at Rosemead School of Psychology have noted, spiritual struggles often follow (Tisdale et al., 2023).

Integration with Whole-Person Healing: Within the LifeScaping System, this inventory connects to the broader work of integrating Mind, Heart, Body, and Spirit. Spiritual health does not exist in isolation—it influences and is influenced by our emotional regulation, thought patterns, and physical well-being.

Clinical Partnership: The assessment generates a profile that can be shared with your therapist, opening essential conversations about how spiritual factors might be supporting or hindering your therapeutic goals. Research consistently shows that mental health professionals should ask patients about spiritual and religious factors to provide holistic, patient-centered care (Moreira-Almeida et al., 2014).

The Path Forward

Spiritual growth is not about having perfect beliefs or maintaining unwavering faith. It is about honest exploration, gentle self-compassion, and the courage to examine what truly sustains us—and what might need to evolve.

As Rumi wrote, “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” Sometimes our spiritual struggles are not obstacles to healing but doorways. A God Image that once felt punishing may need to be reimagined. Practices that once nourished us may need to be released so new ones can emerge. And beliefs we inherited may need to become beliefs we have examined and chosen.

The Spiritual Resources & Beliefs Inventory is one tool in this journey of discovery. It does not tell you what to believe—it helps you understand what you already believe, what resources you already have, and where you might want to grow.

If you would like to explore your own spiritual landscape, the inventory is available at www.visionlogic.org/spiritual.html as part of the VisionLogic Therapeutic Tools. Take your time with it. Be honest. And remember—this is a journey, not a destination.

“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.” — Rumi

Ascend Counseling and Wellness – ascendcw.com – 435.688.1111 – kevin@ascendcw.com

References

Bradshaw, M., Ellison, C. G., & Marcum, J. P. (2010). Attachment to God, images of God, and psychological distress in a nationwide sample of Presbyterians. International Journal for the Psychology of Religion, 20(2), 130–147. https://doi.org/10.1080/10508611003608049

Currier, J. M., Holland, J. M., & Drescher, K. D. (2015). Spirituality factors in the prediction of outcomes of PTSD treatment for U.S. military veterans. Journal of Traumatic Stress, 28(1), 57–64. https://doi.org/10.1002/jts.21978

Hinterberger, T., & Walter, N. (2025). Spirituality and mental health—investigating the association between spiritual attitudes and psychosomatic treatment outcomes. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 15, Article 1497630. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2024.1497630

Koenig, H. G. (2012). Religion, spirituality, and health: The research and clinical implications. International Scholarly Research Notices: Psychiatry, 2012, Article 278730. https://doi.org/10.5402/2012/278730

Moreira-Almeida, A., Koenig, H. G., & Lucchetti, G. (2014). Clinical implications of spirituality to mental health: Review of evidence and practical guidelines. Revista Brasileira de Psiquiatria, 36(2), 176–182. https://doi.org/10.1590/1516-4446-2013-1255

Silton, N. R., Flannelly, K. J., Galek, K., & Ellison, C. G. (2013). Beliefs about God and mental health among American adults. Journal of Religion and Health, 53(5), 1285–1296. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10943-013-9712-3

Stulp, H. P., Koelen, J., Schep-Akkerman, A., Glas, G., & Eurelings-Bontekoe, E. (2019). God representations and aspects of psychological functioning: A meta-analysis. Cogent Psychology, 6(1), Article 1647926. https://doi.org/10.1080/23311908.2019.1647926

Tisdale, T. C., Key, T. L., Edwards, K. J., & Hancock, T. (2023). Doctrinal and experiential God representations: Spiritual struggle and psychological well-being in seminarians. Journal of Psychology and Theology. Advance online publication.

van Nieuw Amerongen-Meeuse, J. C., Segal, Z., & van der Heijden, P. (2023). The evaluation of religious and spirituality-based therapy compared to standard treatment in mental health care: A multi-level meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials. Psychotherapy Research, 34(3), 339–352. https://doi.org/10.1080/10503307.2023.2241626

About the Author

Kevin Todd Brough, M.A., MFT, is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Ascend Counseling & Wellness / Center for Couples & Families in St. George, Utah. He is the developer of the LifeScaping System and VisionLogic Therapeutic Tools. Kevin integrates evidence-based approaches, including CBT, DBT, ACT, Ericksonian hypnotherapy, and Solution-Focused Brief Therapy, with a holistic understanding of Mind, Heart, Body, and Spirit. His work draws on over two decades of experience teaching personal development and recovery principles.

Learn more at www.visionlogic.org or www.ascendcw.com

Embracing the Shadow

Embracing the Shadow: Integration, Transformation, and the Path to Wholeness

Understanding the Shadow in Contemporary Clinical Practice

The concept of the shadow—those disowned, rejected, or unconscious aspects of ourselves—has evolved from Carl Jung’s foundational work into a cornerstone of integrative psychotherapy. In my clinical practice at Ascend Counseling & Wellness, I’ve witnessed how shadow work catalyzes profound transformation when integrated systematically within a trauma-informed framework. The Shadow Dance Assessment, a core component of the LifeScaping™ Therapeutic System, provides clients with a structured pathway to identify, understand, and ultimately integrate these hidden aspects of self.

Jung introduced the shadow as part of his broader theory of the collective unconscious, describing it as the repository of characteristics we find unacceptable and therefore repress into unconsciousness (Jung, 1959). These rejected parts don’t disappear; instead, they exert influence through projection, unconscious behavior patterns, and what I call “shadow dances”—the repetitive relational patterns that emerge when our disowned parts seek expression. As Jung eloquently stated, “Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is” (Jung, 1938, p. 131).

Contemporary neuroscience and attachment research have validated Jung’s clinical observations. Van der Kolk (2014) demonstrates how traumatic experiences fragment the self, creating dissociated parts that operate outside conscious awareness—a phenomenon closely aligned with Jung’s concept of the shadow. These fragmented aspects often contain both the pain of our wounding and the adaptive strategies we developed for survival. Understanding this connection between shadow material and trauma responses is essential for effective clinical intervention.

The Shadow Dance Assessment: A Systematic Approach to Self-Discovery

The Shadow Dance Assessment emerged from my clinical recognition that clients needed a structured, accessible tool to begin identifying their shadow material before deeper therapeutic work could proceed. Within the LifeScaping System’s three-phase framework—Mastering Awareness, Mastering Transformation, and Mastering Intent—the Shadow Dance Assessment anchors the awareness phase by illuminating patterns that would otherwise remain invisible.

The assessment evaluates multiple dimensions of shadow expression: projection patterns, disowned strengths, rejected emotional experiences, and the relational dynamics these create. Research in social psychology confirms that projection serves as a primary defense mechanism, allowing individuals to attribute their own unacceptable thoughts or feelings to others (Baumeister, Dale, & Sommer, 1998). By systematically identifying these projections, clients begin recognizing how their inner landscape shapes their external reality.

What distinguishes the Shadow Dance Assessment from generic personality inventories is its integration of both clinical psychology and systems theory. The assessment doesn’t merely categorize; it reveals the dynamic, interactive nature of shadow material within relationships and family systems. This approach aligns with Bowen’s (1978) family systems theory, which emphasizes how undifferentiated aspects of self become activated in relationship triangles and multigenerational patterns.

Evidence-Based Foundations: From Jung to Contemporary Psychotherapy

While Jung’s work provides the theoretical foundation, contemporary research has substantiated the effectiveness of shadow work across multiple therapeutic modalities. Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, developed by Schwartz (2021), offers a structured framework for working with disowned parts that directly parallels Jungian shadow work. IFS identifies “exiles”—parts carrying pain and shame—and “protectors”—parts that defend against this pain—creating a map remarkably similar to Jung’s topography of consciousness and the unconscious.

Attachment theory further illuminates the development of shadow material. Bowlby (1988) described how early attachment experiences shape internal working models—mental representations of self and others that operate primarily outside awareness. When caregivers cannot accept certain aspects of a child’s emotional experience, those aspects become relegated to the shadow. Disorganized attachment patterns, in particular, often create fragmented self-states that closely resemble shadow dynamics (Liotti, 2004).

Empirical support for shadow-focused interventions continues to grow. Studies on emotion-focused therapy demonstrate that accessing and accepting previously rejected emotional experiences leads to symptom reduction and increased psychological well-being (Greenberg, 2015). Similarly, research on self-compassion—essentially the capacity to embrace all aspects of oneself, including shadow material—shows significant correlations with mental health outcomes (Neff, 2011).

Trauma-informed approaches have integrated shadow concepts through the lens of structural dissociation. Van der Hart, Nijenhuis, and Steele (2006) describe how traumatic experiences create divisions between the “apparently normal personality” and “emotional personalities”—a framework that maps directly onto the relationship between ego and shadow. Their work demonstrates that healing requires integration rather than continued splitting.

Clinical Applications: Shadow Work as Transformative Practice

In my work with clients, shadow integration follows a carefully scaffolded process that honors both the defensive function of repression and the transformative potential of awareness. The Shadow Dance Assessment initiates this process by providing concrete feedback about specific shadow patterns without overwhelming the client’s defensive structure. This assessment-first approach reflects the principle that insight precedes change—clients must first see the pattern before they can transform it.

The assessment results reveal several key shadow categories that emerge repeatedly in clinical practice. The “disowned strength” shadow contains positive qualities—assertiveness, creativity, sensuality—that were punished or shamed in early development. Clients often discover that reclaiming these strengths catalyzes significant life changes. As Zweig and Abrams (1991) note in their seminal work on meeting the shadow, “The gold is in the dark” (p. 6)—meaning that our most significant potential often hides within rejected aspects of self.

The “moral shadow” contains behaviors and impulses that conflict with our conscious values and self-image. Working with this shadow requires particular clinical sensitivity, as premature exposure can trigger overwhelming shame. Here, the integration of compassion-focused therapy (Gilbert, 2009) becomes essential. Clients learn to approach their shadow material with curiosity rather than condemnation, recognizing that all aspects emerged as adaptive responses to earlier circumstances.

Projection represents perhaps the most socially consequential shadow dynamic. When we cannot tolerate certain qualities in ourselves, we perceive them—often with exaggerated intensity—in others. This mechanism underlies numerous relationship conflicts, workplace difficulties, and even societal divisions. The Shadow Dance Assessment helps clients recognize their projection patterns, creating opportunities for what Jung called “withdrawing projections”—the process of reclaiming disowned aspects and taking responsibility for our own psychological material.

Integration Within Systems-Based, Trauma-Informed Care

Shadow work cannot occur in isolation from broader systemic considerations. At Ascend Counseling, we approach shadow integration through a trauma-informed lens that recognizes how survival responses create and maintain shadow material. When a child learns that expressing anger leads to punishment or abandonment, anger becomes shadow. When a family system cannot tolerate vulnerability, strength becomes the persona, and neediness becomes the shadow. These patterns aren’t individual pathology—they’re adaptive responses to systemic conditions.

The Polyvagal Theory, developed by Porges (2011), illuminates the neurophysiological dimension of shadow work. Many shadow aspects became relegated to the unconscious because expressing them triggered nervous system dysregulation—either in the child or the caregiving system. Effective shadow integration, therefore, requires establishing nervous system safety before exploring threatening material. This understanding shapes how we sequence interventions within the LifeScaping System.

The LifeScaping framework positions shadow work within the broader context of personal transformation. The Mastering Awareness phase, which includes the Shadow Dance Assessment, establishes insight into patterns. The Mastering Transformation phase provides structured processes—including parts work, somatic experiencing, and experiential techniques—for integrating shadow material. The Mastering Intent phase helps clients align their newly integrated capacities with purposeful action in the world.

This phased approach reflects what Herman (1992) identified as the essential stages of trauma recovery: establishing safety, reconstructing the trauma narrative (which includes shadow integration), and reconnecting with ordinary life. Shadow work fits naturally within this sequence because unintegrated shadow material often contains both traumatic experiences and the defensive structures erected against them.

The Shadow Dance in Relationship Systems

Shadow dynamics become particularly visible—and particularly impactful—in intimate relationships. What we cannot accept in ourselves, we often marry. This pattern, which Jung called the “syzygy,” creates complementary shadow dances where partners unconsciously collude to maintain each other’s repressions while simultaneously triggering each other’s wounds (Jung, 1959).

Consider the typical dance between the “responsible” and “spontaneous” partners. Often, the responsible partner has disowned their own spontaneity, relegating it to the shadow, while the spontaneous partner has disowned their need for structure and reliability. Each partner then projects their shadow onto the other, simultaneously admiring and resenting what they see. This dynamic can persist for years, creating chronic relationship tension, until one or both partners begin integrating their shadow material.

The Shadow Dance Assessment helps couples identify these complementary patterns by revealing what each partner has disowned. In couples therapy, I often have partners complete the assessment separately, then explore how their respective shadows interact to create their unique relational dance. This work draws on Gottman’s research (Gottman & Silver, 2015) on relationship patterns while adding the shadow dimension that Gottman’s work doesn’t explicitly address.

Family systems theory provides additional depth to understanding shadow dynamics. Bowen (1978) described how families maintain homeostasis by assigning different members specific roles—the “good child,” the “problem child,” the “responsible one,” the “creative one.” These role assignments often reflect the family’s collective shadow, with each member carrying disowned aspects of the family system. Multigenerational patterns emerge when these shadow dynamics transmit across generations, with children unconsciously living out their parents’ or grandparents’ unlived lives.

Integrating Evidence-Based Modalities With Shadow Work

Contemporary psychotherapy offers numerous evidence-based approaches that integrate naturally with shadow work. Dialectical Behavior Therapy’s (DBT) concept of “radical acceptance” (Linehan, 1993) essentially describes accepting all aspects of current reality, including previously rejected parts of self, a core shadow work principle. DBT’s emphasis on dialectical thinking—holding opposing truths simultaneously—mirrors the shadow work requirement of integrating contradictory aspects of self.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) contributes the concept of “psychological flexibility”—the capacity to be present with difficult internal experiences while acting consistently with values (Hayes, Strosahl, & Wilson, 2011). Shadow integration requires precisely this flexibility: the ability to acknowledge and accept previously rejected aspects while choosing how to respond rather than remaining controlled by unconscious material.

Narrative therapy’s practice of “externalizing” problems (White & Epston, 1990) offers another complementary approach. By helping clients recognize that “the problem is the problem, not the person,” narrative therapy creates space to explore shadow material without overwhelming shame. This technique allows clients to develop curiosity about shadow aspects rather than identifying with them completely.

Somatic approaches, particularly Levine’s (1997) Somatic Experiencing, provide essential tools for working with shadow material that exists primarily as body-based experience rather than cognitive content. Many shadow aspects—particularly those formed pre-verbally or through trauma—resist verbal processing. Somatic techniques allow clients to access and integrate these aspects through bodily awareness, movement, and sensation.

The Neuroscience of Shadow Integration

Recent advances in neuroscience illuminate the mechanisms underlying shadow work. Siegel’s (2012) interpersonal neurobiology framework describes how integration—the linking of differentiated parts—represents the essence of mental health. Shadow work, in this view, involves integrating previously differentiated (split-off) aspects of self into a coherent whole.

Neuroimaging studies reveal that emotional suppression—the process that creates shadow material—activates different neural pathways than emotional integration (Gross & John, 2003). Chronic suppression correlates with increased amygdala activation and decreased prefrontal regulation, potentially explaining why unintegrated shadow material often erupts in dysregulated ways. Integration, conversely, involves bringing shadow material into prefrontal awareness where it can be processed more adaptively.

The default mode network (DMN), associated with self-referential thinking and autobiographical memory, appears particularly relevant to shadow work (Raichle, 2015). Shadow integration may involve updating the DMN’s self-narrative to include previously excluded material. This neurological perspective suggests why shadow work often precipitates identity shifts—clients literally revise their neural representation of “who I am.”

Research on neuroplasticity confirms that intentional awareness practices can reshape neural patterns (Davidson & Lutz, 2008). Shadow work, which combines awareness with experiential processing, likely leverages these neuroplastic mechanisms to create lasting change. The Shadow Dance Assessment initiates this process by systematically directing attention toward previously avoided material, beginning the neural rewiring.

Spiritual and Existential Dimensions of Shadow Work

For many clients, particularly those from Judeo-Christian backgrounds, shadow work raises profound spiritual questions. How do we reconcile acceptance of all aspects of self with religious teachings about sin, righteousness, and moral behavior? This tension requires careful clinical navigation that honors both psychological health and spiritual values.

Jung himself viewed shadow integration as essential to individuation—the process of becoming fully oneself—which he considered inherently spiritual (Jung, 1959). From this perspective, shadow work doesn’t mean acting on every impulse or rejecting moral values; instead, it means achieving conscious awareness and choice regarding all aspects of self. A person can acknowledge aggressive impulses without acting aggressively, recognize sexual feelings without acting impulsively, or accept self-centered desires while choosing generosity.

This distinction between awareness and action proves crucial when working with religiously observant clients. The shadow work invitation isn’t to abandon values but to bring unconscious material into consciousness, where it can be consciously directed rather than unconsciously enacted. As Jung noted, “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious” (Jung, 1954, p. 335).

Existential psychology, particularly as articulated by Yalom (1980), emphasizes that confronting existential realities—death, isolation, meaninglessness, and freedom—can create anxiety that is often managed through repression. These existential concerns usually manifest as shadow material. Acknowledging mortality, accepting fundamental aloneness, or confronting the responsibility that accompanies freedom requires integrating shadow aspects that our defenses have kept unconscious.

The Shadow Dance Assessment Within LifeScaping: Practical Implementation

The Shadow Dance Assessment functions as the gateway to deeper therapeutic work within the LifeScaping System. Clients typically complete the assessment early in therapy, often during the second or third session after initial rapport and safety have been established. The assessment generates a comprehensive report identifying key shadow patterns across multiple domains: disowned strengths, projected weaknesses, emotional restrictions, relational patterns, and somatic expressions.

This report becomes a roadmap for subsequent therapeutic work. Rather than leaving shadow work abstract or overwhelming, the assessment provides concrete starting points. A client might discover, for example, that they’ve disowned assertiveness while projecting aggression onto others. This specific insight then guides interventions: assertiveness training, exploration of childhood messages about anger, somatic work with the body’s fear of self-assertion, and relationship experiments with healthy boundary-setting.

The assessment also reveals which shadow aspects carry the most energy—meaning which patterns create the most significant suffering or limitation. This information helps prioritize therapeutic focus, particularly important given that comprehensive shadow integration represents lifelong work rather than a bounded treatment episode. By identifying high-priority patterns, we maximize therapeutic impact while respecting clients’ time and resources.

Integration with other LifeScaping assessments creates additional depth. The Spiritual Resources & Beliefs Inventory, for example, might reveal spiritual resources for shadow integration or, conversely, religious beliefs that complicate acceptance of shadow material. The Big Five Personality Assessment provides a normative context for understanding which personality traits have been exaggerated as persona and which have been relegated to the shadow. This multi-dimensional assessment approach reflects the systems principle that understanding emerges from examining phenomena from multiple perspectives simultaneously.

Therapeutic Techniques for Shadow Integration

Shadow integration requires more than intellectual insight; it demands experiential processing that engages the whole person. In my clinical practice, I integrate multiple modalities depending on client needs and preferences. Internal Family Systems (IFS) provides a particularly effective framework, inviting clients to develop relationships with disowned parts rather than trying to eliminate them (Schwartz, 2021). Through IFS techniques, a client might dialogue with their “critical voice,” discovering that this part developed initially to protect against parental criticism by getting there first.

Gestalt therapy’s empty-chair technique offers another powerful approach to shadow work. Clients can give voice to disowned aspects, speaking as their shadow and discovering what these parts need and offer. This technique often produces surprising insights—the disowned “lazy” part might reveal itself as wisdom about rest, or the shadow “selfish” part might offer healthy self-care capacity.

Ericksonian hypnotherapy provides access to unconscious material through metaphor and indirect suggestion, particularly useful for clients who struggle with confronting shadow aspects directly (Erickson & Rossi, 1979). Through trance work, clients can encounter shadow material symbolically, reducing defensive resistance and facilitating integration.

Art therapy and expressive techniques allow shadow material to emerge through non-verbal channels. Many shadow aspects formed pre-verbally or exist primarily as sensation and image rather than narrative (Malchiodi, 2011). Drawing, sculpting, or movement can access this material more effectively than verbal processing alone.

Somatic techniques prove essential given that shadow material often manifests as body-based experience. Clients might notice chronic tension patterns, restricted breathing, or habitual postural collapse—all of which may represent embodied shadow. Through practices such as body scanning, breathwork, or movement exploration, clients can access and integrate somatically held shadow material (Levine, 1997).

Common Shadow Patterns in Clinical Practice

Specific shadow patterns appear repeatedly across diverse client populations, suggesting universal aspects of shadow formation within Western culture. The “nice person” shadow represents perhaps the most common pattern I encounter. Clients who identify strongly with kindness, agreeableness, and accommodation often have relegated healthy anger, boundary-setting, and self-advocacy to the shadow. This pattern frequently correlates with childhood experiences where expressing needs or disagreeing with caregivers led to relational rupture.

The “strong person” shadow emerges in clients who’ve learned to prioritize independence, competence, and emotional control while disowning vulnerability, neediness, and emotional expression. This pattern often develops in families where dependency was shamed or where children had to become parentified, assuming adult responsibilities prematurely. Males particularly struggle with this shadow pattern, given cultural messages about masculinity that pathologize vulnerability.

The “good person” shadow contains impulses, thoughts, or desires that conflict with moral identity. Sexual feelings, competitive urges, or aggressive fantasies get relegated to the shadows when religious or familial systems cannot accommodate normal human complexity. Working with this shadow requires particular sensitivity to shame while helping clients distinguish between having feelings and acting destructively.

The “intellectual” shadow appears in highly cerebral clients who’ve learned to process everything cognitively while disowning emotional and somatic experience. Often correlated with childhood environments where emotions were unsafe or overwhelming, this pattern leaves clients disconnected from valuable emotional and bodily information. Integration involves developing the capacity for feeling while retaining intellectual strengths.

The “capable person” shadow manifests in high-achieving clients who’ve disowned ordinary human limitations, needs for help, or acceptance of imperfection. This pattern often emerges in families where worth was conditional on performance or where caregivers’ needs took priority over children’s needs. Shadow integration helps these clients develop self-compassion and recognize that worth exists independent of achievement.

Shadow Work and Cultural Considerations

Shadow formation and expression vary significantly across cultural contexts. What gets relegated to shadow depends partly on which qualities a particular culture deems unacceptable. In collectivist cultures, for example, individual desires or preferences might become shadow material more readily than in individualistic cultures. Conversely, in individualistic cultures like the United States, dependency needs or desires for connection might become shadowed (Markus & Kitayama, 1991).

Gender socialization creates predictable shadow patterns. Traditional masculine socialization often relegates emotional expression, vulnerability, and relational attunement to the shadows, while traditional feminine socialization may relegate assertiveness, anger, and ambition to the shadows (Gilligan, 1982). These gendered shadows contribute significantly to relationship dynamics and individual suffering.

Racial and ethnic identity development involves shadow dynamics, particularly for individuals from marginalized groups. Sue and Sue (2015) describe how internalized oppression can lead to disowning aspects of cultural identity, creating shadow material around ethnicity, language, or cultural practices. Conversely, pride in cultural identity might coexist with shadowy shame or anger about experiences of discrimination.

Religious and spiritual backgrounds profoundly shape shadow formation. In my work with predominantly Judeo-Christian clients, I frequently encounter shadow material related to sexuality, anger, doubt, or questioning. These everyday human experiences become shadow when religious contexts cannot accommodate complexity or when rigid interpretations create binary thinking about “good” and “bad.”

Practical shadow work requires cultural humility—recognizing how my own cultural location shapes what I perceive as shadow versus integrated (Hook, Davis, Owen, Worthington, & Utsey, 2013). I must remain curious about each client’s unique cultural context rather than assuming universal shadow patterns.

The Integration Challenge: Resistance and Defense

Shadow integration inevitably activates resistance because the defensive structures that created the shadow originally served protective functions. As clients begin approaching shadow material, they typically experience increased anxiety, intensified defenses, or temporary symptom exacerbation. This response doesn’t indicate therapeutic failure; rather, it reflects the psyche’s protective wisdom.

Understanding resistance through Porges’s (2011) Polyvagal Theory helps normalize this process. When shadow exploration triggers nervous system activation, clients naturally deploy defensive responses—sometimes fighting (becoming argumentative or controlling), sometimes fleeing (missing sessions or changing subjects), sometimes freezing (becoming blank or disconnected). Effective therapy works with these responses rather than interpreting them as opposition.

The therapeutic relationship provides the essential safety required for shadow work. Research on the alliance consistently demonstrates that relationship quality predicts therapeutic outcome more strongly than specific technique (Norcross & Lambert, 2018). For shadow work specifically, clients need to trust that I can remain present with their disowned material without becoming frightened, judgmental, or overwhelmed—essentially providing the attuned, accepting presence that allows integration.

Pacing becomes crucial. Shadow work cannot be rushed; the defensive structure dismantles at its own pace when sufficient safety exists. Premature interpretation or confrontation risks retraumatization or strengthening defenses. The Shadow Dance Assessment facilitates appropriate pacing by providing insight that clients can metabolize gradually rather than overwhelming them with unconscious material.

Some shadow aspects integrate relatively easily once conscious awareness develops. Others require extensive processing, particularly when shadow material involves trauma or deep shame. The LifeScaping System’s phased approach accommodates this reality by providing both initial awareness (through assessment) and sustained transformation work (through process workbooks and ongoing therapy).

Measuring Progress: Shadow Integration as Therapeutic Outcome

How do we know when shadow integration progresses effectively? Several markers indicate successful integration. Clients report decreased projection—recognizing their own contributions to relational conflicts rather than exclusively blaming others. They demonstrate increased emotional range, accessing feelings previously unavailable to them. They experience reduced internal conflict as previously warring parts develop communication and cooperation.

Behaviorally, shadow integration often manifests as increased flexibility. Clients who’ve integrated disowned assertiveness can set boundaries when needed while remaining warm when appropriate. Those who’ve integrated vulnerability can ask for help while retaining capacity for independence. This flexibility reflects what Siegel (2012) identifies as integration’s hallmark: the coordination of previously differentiated elements.

Relationally, shadow integration typically improves intimacy capacity. As clients accept all aspects of themselves, they develop greater acceptance of others’ complexity. They become less reactive to others’ behaviors that trigger their shadow, recognizing these triggers as invitations for self-examination rather than evidence of others’ failings. Research on differentiation of self supports this pattern, demonstrating that individuals who maintain a separate identity while remaining emotionally connected function most effectively in relationships (Bowen, 1978).

Somatically, integration often produces noticeable changes. Chronic tension patterns may release as shadow aspects integrate. Clients report feeling “more at home” in their bodies, experiencing greater body awareness and comfort. This somatic shift reflects the integration of previously dissociated material held in the body.

The Shadow Dance Assessment can be readministered periodically to track changes in shadow patterns over time. While complete shadow integration remains an ongoing developmental process rather than a finite achievement, the assessment can document specific pattern shifts as therapy progresses.

Shadow Work Across the Lifespan

Shadow patterns evolve throughout development, with different aspects becoming prominent at various life stages. Erikson’s (1950) psychosocial development model suggests that each life stage presents unique developmental tasks, and failure to complete these tasks successfully often creates shadow material.

In young adulthood, shadow work frequently involves integrating aspects rejected during identity formation—perhaps career interests dismissed to please parents, relationship patterns adopted defensively, or personal values suppressed to fit peer groups. Levinson’s (1978) concept of the “early adult transition” aligns with intensive shadow work as individuals separate from their family of origin and establish an independent identity.

Midlife often precipitates shadow encounters as the persona that served effectively in early adulthood begins constraining authentic expression. Jung (1933) viewed midlife as the optimal time for shadow work, believing that sufficient ego development must precede the confrontation of unconscious material. The “midlife crisis” might be reconceptualized as a shadow emergence—disowned aspects demanding recognition and integration.

Later adulthood offers opportunities to integrate regrets, unlived lives, and aspects of the self never fully expressed. Erikson’s (1950) “integrity versus despair” stage involves accepting one’s life as lived, which requires making peace with both lived and unlived potentials—essentially a comprehensive shadow integration task.

The LifeScaping System, while valuable at any age, may prove particularly impactful during life transitions when existing identity structures become inadequate and shadow material naturally surfaces. Developmental transitions create natural openings for transformation, and structured shadow work during these periods can facilitate healthier reorganization.

Contraindications and Clinical Considerations

While shadow work benefits most clients, specific clinical presentations require modified approaches or contraindications. Clients with acute psychosis shouldn’t engage in intensive shadow work, as their reality testing is already compromised. Similarly, clients in crisis require stabilization before exploring shadow material that might intensify distress.

Early-stage trauma recovery often contraindicates deep shadow work. Herman’s (1992) trauma recovery model emphasizes establishing safety and stabilization before memory processing or parts work. During safety-building phases, the Shadow Dance Assessment might be administered but not deeply processed, with integration work reserved for later treatment stages.

Clients with severe personality disorders, particularly those with fragile reality testing or primitive defenses, require careful consideration. While shadow work might ultimately benefit these clients, it must proceed slowly with extensive attention to the therapeutic relationship and defensive structure. Consultation and careful case conceptualization prove essential.

Substance use disorders complicate shadow work, as active addiction typically involves significant denial and projection—shadow mechanisms. However, sobriety alone doesn’t resolve underlying shadow patterns; recovery often requires addressing shadow material that contributed to addiction development. The timing and pacing of shadow work with this population requires clinical judgment and often follows initial addiction stabilization.

Cultural factors warrant careful consideration. In some cultural contexts, emphasizing individual shadow work might conflict with collectivist values or spiritual beliefs. The assessment and integration process should be adapted to honor diverse cultural frameworks while maintaining therapeutic effectiveness.

Future Directions: Shadow Work in Contemporary Practice

As psychotherapy continues integrating diverse theoretical frameworks and evidence-based practices, shadow work’s relevance expands rather than diminishes. The current emphasis on transdiagnostic approaches—interventions addressing standard underlying processes across diagnoses—aligns naturally with shadow work, as unintegrated shadow material contributes to multiple presenting problems (Barlow et al., 2017).

Technology offers new possibilities for delivering shadow work and assessing it. The Shadow Dance Assessment’s online format increases accessibility while maintaining clinical rigor. Future developments might include adaptive assessments that tailor questions based on responses, or integration with wearable devices tracking physiological responses to shadow material.

Research opportunities abound. While clinical observation supports the effectiveness of shadow work, systematic outcome studies comparing shadow-focused interventions with other approaches would strengthen the evidence base. Neuroimaging studies examining neural changes associated with shadow integration could illuminate underlying mechanisms. Longitudinal research tracking shadow integration across the lifespan would enhance developmental understanding.

The integration of shadow work with emerging modalities like ketamine-assisted psychotherapy or MDMA-assisted therapy for PTSD presents intriguing possibilities. These consciousness-modifying approaches often facilitate rapid access to unconscious material, potentially accelerating shadow integration when combined with appropriate therapeutic structure (Carhart-Harris & Goodwin, 2017).

Cultural competency in shadow work requires ongoing development. As our understanding of intersectionality deepens, shadow work must increasingly account for how multiple social identities shape shadow formation and expression. Training programs would benefit from explicitly teaching culturally responsive shadow-work approaches.

Conclusion: The Transformative Promise of Shadow Integration

Shadow work represents both ancient wisdom and contemporary clinical practice—a bridge between Jung’s depth psychology and modern neuroscience, between spiritual seeking and evidence-based intervention. The Shadow Dance Assessment provides structure and accessibility to this profound work, demystifying shadow exploration while maintaining its transformative potential.

Within the LifeScaping System, shadow integration serves as foundational work—clearing the debris that obscures authentic selfhood and purposeful living. Without shadow integration, personal transformation remains incomplete; we cannot fully become who we’re meant to be while parts of us stay exiled in darkness. Yet with sustained shadow work, clients discover that what they most feared in themselves often contains exactly what they most need.

The clinical implications extend beyond individual therapy. As we help clients integrate their shadows, we potentially contribute to reducing social projection, decreasing interpersonal conflict, and increasing capacity for complexity and nuance—qualities desperately needed in contemporary discourse. When individuals stop projecting their disowned material onto others, they become capable of genuine relationships and authentic communities.

This work requires courage from both therapist and client. It demands that I, as a clinician, remain engaged with my own shadow material so I don’t unconsciously project onto clients or collude with their defenses. It requires that clients tolerate the discomfort of self-examination and the vulnerability of acknowledging previously rejected aspects.

Yet the rewards justify the challenges. Clients who integrate shadow material consistently report feeling more whole, more authentic, more alive. They describe reduced internal warfare and increased peace. They experience improved relationships characterized by greater intimacy and less reactivity. They discover capacities they didn’t know they possessed—capacities that were there all along, waiting in the shadows to be reclaimed.

The Shadow Dance Assessment represents my attempt to make this transformative work systematic, accessible, and measurable. By providing clear insight into shadow patterns, the assessment reduces the mystery that can make shadow work feel overwhelming or esoteric. By integrating with the broader LifeScaping System, it ensures that shadow work connects with purposeful transformation rather than remaining isolated self-exploration.

As I continue developing the LifeScaping System and refining the Shadow Dance Assessment, I’m guided by the conviction that emerged from my own transformative experience in 2001: people can change, healing is possible, and structured, evidence-based interventions can catalyze profound transformation. Shadow work, approached systematically within a trauma-informed, systems-based framework, offers one powerful pathway to the wholeness and authenticity that represent our birthright as human beings.

Try the free Shadow Dance Assessment

Ascend Counseling and Wellness – ascendcw.com – 435.688.1111 – kevin@ascendcw.com


References

Barlow, D. H., Farchione, T. J., Bullis, J. R., Gallagher, M. W., Murray-Latin, H., Sauer-Zavala, S., … & Cassiello-Robbins, C. (2017). The unified protocol for transdiagnostic treatment of emotional disorders compared with diagnosis-specific protocols for anxiety disorders: A randomized clinical trial. JAMA Psychiatry, 74(9), 875-884. https://doi.org/10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2017.2164

Baumeister, R. F., Dale, K., & Sommer, K. L. (1998). Freudian defense mechanisms and empirical findings in modern social psychology: Reaction formation, projection, displacement, undoing, isolation, sublimation, and denial. Journal of Personality, 66(6), 1081-1124. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-6494.00043

Bowen, M. (1978). Family therapy in clinical practice. Jason Aronson.

Bowlby, J. (1988). A secure base: Parent-child attachment and healthy human development. Basic Books.

Carhart-Harris, R. L., & Goodwin, G. M. (2017). The therapeutic potential of psychedelic drugs: Past, present, and future. Neuropsychopharmacology, 42(11), 2105-2113. https://doi.org/10.1038/npp.2017.84

Davidson, R. J., & Lutz, A. (2008). Buddha’s brain: Neuroplasticity and meditation. IEEE Signal Processing Magazine, 25(1), 176-174. https://doi.org/10.1109/MSP.2008.4431873

Erickson, M. H., & Rossi, E. L. (1979). Hypnotherapy: An exploratory casebook. Irvington Publishers.

Erikson, E. H. (1950). Childhood and society. W. W. Norton & Company.

Gilbert, P. (2009). Introducing compassion-focused therapy. Advances in Psychiatric Treatment, 15(3), 199-208. https://doi.org/10.1192/apt.bp.107.005264

Gilligan, C. (1982). In a different voice: Psychological theory and women’s development. Harvard University Press.

Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2015). The seven principles for making marriage work: A practical guide from the country’s foremost relationship expert (Rev. ed.). Harmony Books.

Greenberg, L. S. (2015). Emotion-focused therapy: Coaching clients to work through their feelings (2nd ed.). American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/14692-000

Gross, J. J., & John, O. P. (2003). Individual differences in two emotion regulation processes: Implications for affect, relationships, and well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 85(2), 348-362. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.85.2.348

Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2011). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

Herman, J. L. (1992). Trauma and recovery: The aftermath of violence—from domestic abuse to political terror. Basic Books.

Hook, J. N., Davis, D. E., Owen, J., Worthington, E. L., Jr., & Utsey, S. O. (2013). Cultural humility: Measuring openness to culturally diverse clients. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 60(3), 353-366. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0032595

Jung, C. G. (1933). Modern man in search of a soul. Harcourt, Brace & World.

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Liotti, G. (2004). Trauma, dissociation, and disorganized attachment: Three strands of a single braid. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research, Practice, Training, 41(4), 472-486. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-3204.41.4.472

Malchiodi, C. A. (2011). Handbook of art therapy (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

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Neff, K. D. (2011). Self-compassion, self-esteem, and well-being. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 5(1), 1-12. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1751-9004.2010.00330.x

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Schwartz, R. C. (2021). No bad parts: Healing trauma and restoring wholeness with the Internal Family Systems model. Sounds True.

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Sue, D. W., & Sue, D. (2015). Counseling the culturally diverse: Theory and practice (7th ed.). Wiley.

Van der Hart, O., Nijenhuis, E. R., & Steele, K. (2006). The haunted self: Structural dissociation and the treatment of chronic traumatization. W. W. Norton & Company.

Van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Viking.

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Congruency & Harmony

Finding Your Inner Harmony: How Parts Work Can Heal Trauma and Transform Your Life

Discovering the power of working with—rather than against—all aspects of yourself


Have you ever noticed that sometimes you feel like you’re at war with yourself? Maybe part of you desperately wants to pursue a dream, while another part holds you back with fear and doubt. Or perhaps you find yourself being incredibly loving and patient with others, yet harshly critical of yourself. You might even catch yourself saying things like “Part of me wants to…” or “I’m torn between…” without realizing you’re actually describing something profound about how your mind naturally works.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone—and you’re not broken. What you’re experiencing is the natural multiplicity of the human psyche, and understanding this can be the key to profound healing and personal transformation.

The Revolutionary Understanding: You Are Not One, But Many

For decades, psychology has been moving away from the idea that we each have one fixed personality toward recognizing that we all naturally contain multiple aspects or “parts” within ourselves (Schwartz, 2021). This isn’t a sign of mental illness—it’s how healthy minds naturally organize themselves to navigate the complexity of human life.

Think about it: You probably show up differently when you’re at work versus when you’re playing with children. You have a part that’s responsible and organized, another that’s playful and spontaneous, perhaps one that’s cautious and another that’s adventurous. These aren’t different personalities—they’re different facets of your complete self, each with its own wisdom and gifts.

“The goal isn’t to eliminate parts of ourselves, but to create internal harmony where all parts can coexist and contribute their unique strengths.” — Richard Schwartz, creator of Internal Family Systems

When Parts Work Against Each Other: The Roots of Inner Conflict

Problems arise when our parts become polarized against each other or when some parts take over to protect us from old wounds. This often happens as a result of trauma, difficult life experiences, or simply growing up in a world that taught us certain parts of ourselves were “unacceptable.”

For example, if you were hurt or rejected in childhood, you might have developed:

  • A protective part that keeps you isolated to avoid future rejection
  • A critical part that constantly points out your flaws to prevent mistakes
  • A people-pleasing part that sacrifices your needs to maintain a connection
  • A wounded part that still carries the original pain and fear

When these parts operate independently without communication, you end up feeling fragmented, conflicted, and exhausted from the internal battle (Van der Hart et al., 2006).

The Promise of Parts Work: Integration, Not Elimination

Here’s the revolutionary insight that forms the foundation of all parts-based healing approaches: Every part of you developed for good reasons, and every part has gifts to offer. The goal isn’t to eliminate “difficult” parts, but to understand what they’re trying to protect and help them find healthier ways to contribute.

Parts work—whether through Internal Family Systems (IFS), inner child healing, or other related approaches—offers a compassionate pathway to:

  • Understand rather than judge your internal conflicts
  • Heal old wounds that keep parts stuck in protective patterns
  • Integrate all aspects of yourself into a harmonious whole
  • Access your wise, centered Self that can lead with compassion

Your Wise, Unbroken Self: The Leader Within

One of the most hopeful discoveries of parts work is that beneath all the protective patterns and wounded parts lies what IFS calls your “Self”—your essential, wise, and compassionate core, which was never damaged by trauma or difficult experiences (Schwartz, 2021). This Self has the capacity to:

  • Hold space for all your parts with curiosity and compassion
  • Make decisions from wisdom rather than fear
  • Heal the wounds that keep parts stuck in old patterns
  • Lead your internal system with kindness and clarity

When you learn to access and strengthen this Self-leadership, everything changes. Instead of being caught in internal battles, you become the calm, loving presence that can help all your parts feel heard, valued, and safe.

What Parts Work Looks Like: A Journey of Self-Compassion

Parts work isn’t about analyzing yourself into pieces—it’s about developing a loving relationship with every aspect of who you are. In therapy, this might involve:

Getting to Know Your Parts

  • Identifying the different aspects of yourself and the roles they play
  • Understanding what each part is trying to protect or achieve
  • Recognizing when parts are activated by current situations

Healing Old Wounds

  • Helping wounded parts share their stories and pain
  • Providing the care and understanding they needed but didn’t receive
  • Releasing the burdens of shame, fear, and trauma they’ve been carrying

Negotiating New Relationships

  • Helping protective parts trust your Self to handle challenges
  • Finding healthy ways for all parts to express their gifts
  • Creating internal collaboration instead of conflict

Living from Self-Leadership

  • Making decisions from your wise, centered Self
  • Responding to life’s challenges with all your parts’ resources
  • Maintaining internal harmony even during stress

The Profound Healing Possible

When people engage in parts work, they often experience transformations that feel almost miraculous:

  • Inner peace replaces constant self-criticism and conflict
  • Authentic relationships become possible when you’re not hiding parts of yourself
  • Creative expression flows when previously suppressed parts are welcomed
  • Emotional resilience develops as you learn to care for yourself with compassion
  • Life purpose becomes clearer when all your parts can contribute their wisdom

Research has shown that parts-based approaches like IFS are effective for treating trauma, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and relationship difficulties (Hodgdon et al., 2022; Shadick et al., 2013). But beyond symptom relief, people report feeling more whole, authentic, and alive than ever before.

Signs That Parts Work Might Be Right for You

Consider parts work if you:

  • Feel like you’re “at war with yourself” or constantly conflicted
  • Notice harsh self-criticism or perfectionism
  • Experience anxiety, depression, or trauma symptoms
  • Feel disconnected from your authentic self
  • Have relationship patterns you want to change
  • Want to heal from childhood wounds or difficult experiences
  • Feel like some parts of your personality are “stuck” or immature
  • Long to feel more integrated and whole

Beginning Your Journey: First Steps Toward Inner Harmony

If parts work resonates with you, here are some ways to begin:

Start with Self-Compassion

  • Notice when you’re being self-critical and try speaking to yourself with kindness
  • Practice asking, “What is this part of me trying to protect or achieve?”
  • Treat your internal conflicts with curiosity rather than judgment

Pay Attention to Your Inner Voices

  • Notice the different “voices” or perspectives inside you
  • Instead of fighting difficult emotions, try asking what they need
  • Practice thanking your parts for trying to help, even when their methods are outdated

Seek Professional Support

  • Look for therapists trained in parts-based approaches like IFS, inner child work, or other trauma-informed therapy
  • Consider that healing happens in a collaborative relationship—having a compassionate witness can accelerate your journey
  • Remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness

A New Way of Being Human

Parts work offers something our culture desperately needs: a way of being human that honors complexity, embraces all emotions, and treats every aspect of ourselves with dignity and respect. Instead of trying to be “perfect” or eliminating parts of yourself you don’t like, you can learn to be a loving leader of your own internal community.

Imagine what it would feel like to:

  • Wake up without that critical voice immediately pointing out everything wrong
  • Make decisions from wisdom and self-love rather than fear
  • Feel confident in who you are, knowing all your parts are valued
  • Approach challenges with the full resources of your integrated self
  • Live authentically without hiding or rejecting parts of yourself

This isn’t fantasy—it’s the natural state of a healthy, integrated human being. And it’s available to you.

Your Invitation to Wholeness

Your journey toward inner harmony begins with a simple but profound shift: instead of fighting against the parts of yourself you don’t like, what if you got curious about what they’re trying to tell you? What if the very aspects of yourself you’ve been trying to change hold keys to your healing and wholeness?

Every part of you—even the ones that seem problematic—developed to help you survive and navigate life’s challenges. They deserve your compassion, not your criticism. And when you learn to lead them with love, they become your greatest allies in creating the life you truly want.

You don’t have to carry the burden of internal conflict alone. Professional support through parts-based therapy can provide the safe, compassionate space you need to heal old wounds, integrate all aspects of yourself, and step into the wholeness that is your birthright.

Your parts have been waiting for someone to listen to them with kindness and understanding. That someone is you—the wise, compassionate Self that has always been there, ready to lead with love.

Kevin Brough – Ascend Counseling and Wellness, St. George, Utah – 435.688.1111 – kevin@ascendcw.com


If you’re interested in exploring parts work therapy, look for licensed mental health professionals trained in Internal Family Systems (IFS), inner child work, or trauma-informed parts-based approaches. The journey toward inner harmony is one of the most valuable investments you can make in yourself and your relationships.


References

Hodgdon, H. B., Anderson, F., Southwell, E., Hrubec, W., Schwartz, R., & Tompkins, M. A. (2022). Internal Family Systems therapy for posttraumatic stress disorder among female survivors of childhood sexual abuse: A pilot effectiveness study. Journal of Evidence-Based Social Work, 19(2), 108-125.

Schwartz, R. C. (2021). No bad parts: Healing trauma and restoring wholeness with the Internal Family Systems model. Sounds True.

Shadick, N. A., Sowell, N. F., Frits, M. L., Hoffman, S. M., Hartz, S. A., Booth, F. D., Sweezy, M., Rogers, M. P., Duhamel, J. P., & Weinblatt, M. E. (2013). A randomized controlled trial of an Internal Family Systems-based psychotherapeutic intervention on outcomes in rheumatoid arthritis: A proof-of-concept study. Journal of Rheumatology, 40(11), 1831-1841.

Van der Hart, O., Nijenhuis, E. R. S., & Steele, K. (2006). The haunted self: Structural dissociation and the treatment of chronic traumatization. W. W. Norton & Company.

A Path to Peace

Love Is Letting Go of Fear: A Path to Peace and Emotional Resilience

In a world often characterized by stress, anxiety, and conflict, the timeless wisdom found in Gerald Jampolsky’s “Love Is Letting Go of Fear” offers a refreshing perspective on creating inner peace. This seminal work, first published in 1979, resonates with readers seeking emotional freedom and authentic connection. Let’s explore how Jampolsky’s principles align with other philosophical traditions and contemporary psychological approaches to cultivate peace and nurture life-affirming emotional states.

The Core Message: Choosing Love Over Fear

At its heart, Jampolsky’s work presents a simple yet profound premise: We operate from one of two emotional states—love or fear. These states are mutually exclusive; when we choose love, fear dissipates. Jampolsky, influenced by A Course in Miracles, suggests that fear-based thinking manifests as judgment, attack, and self-protection, while love-based consciousness expresses forgiveness, compassion, and peace (Jampolsky, 1979).

This binary framework echoes ancient wisdom traditions. In Buddhist philosophy, suffering (dukkha) arises from attachment and aversion – essentially fear-based responses to life’s impermanence. The antidote is loving-kindness (metta) and compassion (karuna), which dissolve the boundaries between self and other (Nhat Hanh, 2015).

Forgiveness as a Path to Freedom

Jampolsky emphasizes forgiveness as essential for releasing fear and embracing love. He defines forgiveness not as pardoning wrongdoing, but as relinquishing our investment in grievances. When we hold onto perceived injustices, we remain prisoners of the past, unable to experience the present fully.

This perspective parallels the work of Fred Luskin, whose Stanford Forgiveness Project demonstrates that forgiveness training significantly reduces stress, anger, and physical symptoms of anxiety while increasing optimism and emotional well-being (Luskin, 2003). Luskin describes forgiveness as “the feeling of peace that emerges as you take your hurt less personally, take responsibility for how you feel, and become a hero instead of a victim in the story you tell.”

The Mind-Body Connection

The physiological impact of choosing love over fear is well-documented. When we operate from fear, our sympathetic nervous system activates, triggering the stress response and releasing cortisol and adrenaline. Prolonged states of fear compromise immune function and contribute to numerous health problems (Sapolsky, 2004).

Conversely, love-based emotions activate the parasympathetic nervous system, releasing oxytocin and promoting relaxation, healing, and connection. Barbara Fredrickson’s research supports this through her “broaden-and-build” theory of positive emotions, demonstrating that positive emotional states expand our awareness and build enduring personal resources (Fredrickson, 2013).

Integration with Contemporary Approaches

Several modern therapeutic modalities align with Jampolsky’s philosophy:

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT, developed by Steven Hayes, emphasizes psychological flexibility and accepting complex thoughts and feelings rather than fighting them. This acceptance creates space for values-driven action and authentic connection, moving from fear-based resistance to love-based engagement (Hayes et al., 2006).

Internal Family Systems

Richard Schwartz’s Internal Family Systems model conceptualizes the mind as containing multiple sub-personalities or “parts,” often formed in response to painful experiences. The model focuses on accessing the “Self” – a compassionate, curious core presence reminiscent of Jampolsky’s love-based consciousness – to heal wounded parts (Schwartz, 2001).

Self-Compassion

Kristin Neff’s work on self-compassion provides practical applications of extending love toward oneself. She identifies three components of self-compassion: self-kindness versus self-judgment, common humanity versus isolation, and mindfulness versus over-identification with painful thoughts and feelings (Neff, 2011). These components mirror Jampolsky’s practices for releasing self-criticism and recognizing our fundamental connectedness.

Practical Applications for Cultivating Peace

Drawing from Jampolsky and complementary approaches, these practices can foster peace and emotional resilience:

Present-Moment Awareness

Fear often concerns the future or past, while love exists in the present. Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) offers structured practices for returning to the present moment, where peace naturally arises (Kabat-Zinn, 2013).

Gratitude Practice

Robert Emmons’ research demonstrates that gratitude interventions significantly increase well-being and positive emotions while reducing negative states like envy and resentment (Emmons & McCullough, 2003). Gratitude shifts attention from what we fear losing to what we love having.

Service to Others

Jampolsky’s Center for Attitudinal Healing was founded on the principle that helping others accelerates our own healing. This aligns with findings that altruistic behaviors activate reward centers in the brain and decrease focus on personal distress (Post, 2005).

Question Fear-Based Thoughts

Byron Katie’s “The Work” offers a direct method for identifying and questioning stressful thoughts. By asking four questions about our fear-based beliefs, we can experience the freedom from seeing beyond our limiting stories (Katie, 2002).

Building Resilient Communities Through Love-Based Principles

The implications of Jampolsky’s philosophy extend beyond individual well-being to community and societal transformation. When individuals practice shifting from fear to love, the collective impact can be profound.

Restorative justice movements exemplify this approach, focusing on healing harm rather than punishment. By bringing together those who have caused harm with those affected by it in facilitated dialogue centered on accountability, repair, and reintegration, these practices embody the principles of forgiveness and connection essential to love-based consciousness (Zehr, 2015).

Similarly, nonviolent communication, developed by Marshall Rosenberg, offers a framework for expressing ourselves honestly while receiving others empathically, transforming potential conflict into connection (Rosenberg, 2015). This approach dissolves the fear-based need to defend, attack, or withdraw, creating space for authentic relationships.

Conclusion: The Ongoing Journey

The journey from fear to love is not a one-time transformation but a continuous practice. As Jampolsky reminds us, each moment presents a new opportunity to choose peace over conflict, connection over separation, and love over fear. By integrating these principles with complementary wisdom from psychology, neuroscience, and contemplative traditions, we develop greater capacity for emotional resilience and authentic presence.

The message remains clear in a world that often seems defined by division and uncertainty: when we release fear, love emerges naturally as our default state. In that state, we discover not only personal peace but also the potential for healing our collective wounds and creating more compassionate communities.

Kevin Brough / Ascend Counseling and Wellness / http://www.ascendcw.com / 435.688.1111

References

Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2003). Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-389.

Fredrickson, B. L. (2013). Positive emotions broaden and build. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 47, 1-53.

Hayes, S. C., Luoma, J. B., Bond, F. W., Masuda, A., & Lillis, J. (2006). Acceptance and commitment therapy: Model, processes and outcomes. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 44(1), 1-25.

Jampolsky, G. G. (1979). Love is letting go of fear. Celestial Arts.

Kabat-Zinn, J. (2013). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness. Bantam Books.

Katie, B. (2002). Loving what is: Four questions that can change your life. Harmony Books.

Luskin, F. (2003). Forgive for good: A proven prescription for health and happiness. HarperOne.

Neff, K. (2011). Self-compassion: The proven power of being kind to yourself. William Morrow.

Nhat Hanh, T. (2015). The heart of the Buddha’s teaching: Transforming suffering into peace, joy, and liberation. Harmony Books.

Post, S. G. (2005). Altruism, happiness, and health: It’s good to be good. International Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 12(2), 66-77.

Rosenberg, M. B. (2015). Nonviolent communication: A language of life. PuddleDancer Press.

Sapolsky, R. M. (2004). Why zebras don’t get ulcers: The acclaimed guide to stress, stress-related diseases, and coping. Holt Paperbacks.

Schwartz, R. C. (2001). Introduction to the internal family systems model. Trailheads Publications.

Zehr, H. (2015). The little book of restorative justice. Good Books.