
Finding Your Anchor: Reclaiming Power in the Storm of Hyperarousal
When trauma has hijacked your nervous system and hope feels like a foreign concept, how do you find solid ground? This is for anyone whose trauma history has left them feeling powerless in their own body, searching for tools to navigate hyperarousal and rediscover their inherent strength.
When Your Body Betrays Your Spirit
If you’re reading this while your heart races, your thoughts spiral, or your body feels like it’s vibrating with an energy you can’t control, you’re not broken. You’re experiencing hyperarousal—your nervous system’s attempt to protect you that has become stuck in overdrive. When trauma lives in our bodies, it can feel like we’re passengers in a runaway vehicle, watching our lives unfold without any sense of agency or hope.
But here’s what trauma wants you to forget: even in the most activated state, you still have choices. Micro-choices. Moment-by-moment decisions that can slowly shift the trajectory of your experience.
The Space Between Stimulus and Response
Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and founder of logotherapy, discovered something profound in the concentration camps that speaks directly to this experience: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
When you’re hyperaroused, that space feels impossibly small—maybe just a microsecond. But it exists. Your trauma history may have taught your nervous system to react with lightning speed, but it cannot eliminate that fundamental human capacity for choice.
Right now, as you read this, you’re already exercising that choice. You chose to seek resources. You chose to keep looking for answers despite feeling hopeless. This is your first act of reclaiming power.
Grounding in the Present: DBT Skills for Hyperarousal
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) offers concrete tools specifically designed for moments when your emotional intensity feels unbearable. When hyperarousal hits, try these TIPP skills:
Temperature
Splash cold water on your face or hold ice cubes. This activates your dive response, literally slowing your heart rate within 15-30 seconds. Your nervous system cannot maintain hyperarousal when this physiological brake is applied.
Intense Exercise
Do jumping jacks, run in place, or do push-ups for 10 minutes. Match your body’s energy rather than fighting it. Sometimes we need to move through activation, not around it.
Paced Breathing
Exhale longer than you inhale. Try breathing in for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 6. This stimulates your vagus nerve and signals safety to your nervous system.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Tense and release muscle groups systematically. When trauma makes us feel powerless, this reminds us we can still control something—our own muscle tension.
The Acceptance Paradox: ACT Principles
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches us something counterintuitive: the struggle against our experience often amplifies our suffering. When you’re hyperaroused and fighting against it, you’re essentially having two problems—the activation itself, and the exhausting battle against it.
The Quicksand Metaphor
Imagine hyperarousal as quicksand. The more frantically you struggle, the deeper you sink. But if you can stop fighting and slowly, deliberately work with the medium you’re in, you can find your way to solid ground.
This doesn’t mean giving up or being passive. It means recognizing that your power lies not in controlling your nervous system’s responses, but in choosing how you relate to them.
Values as Your North Star
When everything feels chaotic, your values become your compass. Ask yourself: What matters to me beyond this moment of suffering? Maybe it’s connection, creativity, justice, or growth. Even tiny actions aligned with your values—sending a text to a friend, creating something small, standing up for yourself in a minor way—can restore a sense of meaning and agency.
Cognitive Reframing: Rewriting the Story
Your traumatized nervous system tells a very specific story: “You’re in danger. You’re powerless. This will never end.”Cognitive reframing isn’t about positive thinking—it’s about examining the evidence and expanding your perspective.
The Temporary Nature Reframe
“This feeling is permanent” becomes “This is my nervous system doing what it learned to do to survive. Hyperarousal has a beginning, middle, and end. I’ve survived 100% of my worst days so far.”
The Capability Reframe
“I can’t handle this” becomes “I’m handling this right now. I may not be handling it gracefully or comfortably, but I’m here, I’m breathing, and I’m seeking resources. That’s evidence of my resilience.”
The Learning Reframe
“My trauma ruined me” becomes “My trauma taught my nervous system to be hypervigilant in a world that felt dangerous. Now I’m learning to teach it new responses for a life I’m creating.”
Pattern Interrupts: Breaking the Hyperarousal Loop
When your nervous system is stuck in a loop, pattern interrupts can create the neurological “reset” you need:
The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique
- 5 things you can see
- 4 things you can touch
- 3 things you can hear
- 2 things you can smell
- 1 thing you can taste
This forces your activated nervous system to engage with present-moment sensory data rather than trauma memories or catastrophic projections.
The Opposite Action
If hyperarousal makes you want to isolate, reach out to one person. If it makes you want to run, sit down and breathe. If it makes you want to clench, stretch and open. This isn’t about forcing yourself into positivity—it’s about providing new neurological input.
The Curiosity Flip
Instead of “Why is this happening to me again?” try “I wonder what my nervous system is trying to protect me from right now. What would it need to feel safer?” Curiosity activates different neural pathways than fear or frustration.
Frankl’s Ultimate Teaching: Finding Meaning in Suffering
Frankl discovered that even in the most extreme circumstances, people could endure unimaginable suffering if they could find meaning in it. He wrote: “Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any ‘how.'”
Your hyperarousal, your trauma history, your current struggle—none of it is meaningless suffering. Your nervous system’s responses developed for reasons. They served you once. And now, your journey toward healing—even this moment of seeking resources while activated—can serve something larger.
Perhaps your healing contributes to breaking generational patterns. Perhaps your resilience inspires others who feel hopeless. Perhaps your willingness to keep trying in the face of trauma teaches your nervous system that the world can be different than it once was.
Building Your Micro-Recovery Plan
When you’re overwhelmed, grandiose healing plans feel impossible. Instead, focus on micro-interventions:
Daily Non-Negotiables (Choose 1-2)
- One minute of conscious breathing
- One text to a supportive person
- One tiny act of self-care
- One moment of moving your body
- One instance of challenging a negative thought
Weekly Anchor Points
- One activity that connects you to your values
- One practice that helps you feel grounded
- One step toward longer-term healing (therapy, support group, etc.)
Emergency Toolkit
Keep a note on your phone with:
- Three people you can contact
- Two grounding techniques that work for you
- One phrase that reminds you this is temporary
- Your personal evidence that you’ve survived hard things before
The Neuroscience of Hope
Here’s something your hyperaroused nervous system doesn’t want you to know: neuroplasticity means your brain can change throughout your entire life. The neural pathways carved by trauma are real, but they’re not permanent. Every time you practice a new response, use a coping skill, or choose differently, you’re literally rewiring your brain.
Research shows that practices like mindfulness, cognitive reframing, and somatic interventions can actually change brain structure—strengthening areas associated with emotional regulation and weakening overactive fear centers (Davidson & Lutz, 2008; Hölzel et al., 2011).
Your hyperarousal is not evidence that you’re broken. It’s evidence that your nervous system is incredibly responsive—and that same responsiveness can work in your favor as you practice new patterns.
For the Moments When Hope Feels Impossible
If you’re reading this and thinking “This all sounds nice, but you don’t understand how bad it really is,” you’re right. I don’t understand your specific experience. But I understand this: you’re still here. You’re still seeking resources. You’re still trying.
In his darkest moments in the concentration camps, Frankl would visualize himself giving lectures about the psychological insights he was gaining from his suffering. He found meaning by imagining how his current pain might serve future healing—both his own and others’.
What if your current struggle is gathering data for your future self? What if your hyperarousal is teaching you something about resilience that you’ll later use to help others? What if this moment of feeling powerless is actually the beginning of you reclaiming your power?
The Practice of Radical Self-Compassion
One final tool: when hyperarousal hits, instead of judging yourself for being activated, try offering yourself the same compassion you’d give a frightened child or wounded animal. Your nervous system is not your enemy—it’s trying to protect you the only way it knows how.
“This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is part of the human experience. May I be kind to myself in this moment. May I find the strength to take one small step toward safety.”
Your Next Right Thing
You don’t need to heal completely right now. You don’t need to believe in your recovery. You don’t even need to feel hopeful. You just need to take your next right thing.
Maybe that’s trying one breathing technique. Maybe it’s reaching out to a therapist. Maybe it’s simply deciding to read this again tomorrow. Maybe it’s choosing to stay.
Your trauma history is part of your story, but it’s not the end of your story. Your hyperarousal is real, but it’s not permanent. Your sense of powerlessness is understandable, but it’s not accurate.
In this moment, you have the power to choose your next breath. That’s where freedom begins.
Kevin Brough – Ascend Counseling & Wellness – Ascendcw.com – 435.688.1111 – kevin@ascendcw.com
References
Frankl, V. E. (1946). Man’s Search for Meaning. Beacon Press.
Linehan, M. M. (2014). DBT Skills Training Manual. Guilford Press.
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2011). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: The Process and Practice of Mindful Change. Guilford Press.
Beck, J. S. (2011). Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond. Guilford Press.
van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. Viking.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
Davidson, R. J., & Lutz, A. (2008). Buddha’s brain: Neuroplasticity and meditation. IEEE Signal Processing Magazine, 25(6), 176-188.
Hölzel, B. K., Carmody, J., Vangel, M., Congleton, C., Yerramsetti, S. M., Gard, T., & Lazar, S. W. (2011). Mindfulness practice leads to increases in regional brain gray matter density. Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, 191(1), 36-43.
Siegel, D. J. (2012). The Developing Mind: How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are. Guilford Press.
If you’re in crisis, please reach out to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call or text 988) or your local emergency services. You don’t have to navigate this alone.




